Financial Alchemy

Thank you to TurboTax for sponsoring my writing about household finances. Learn more about how TurboTax can help you find every tax deduction you deserve. I was selected for this sponsorship by the Clever Girls Collective, which endorses Blog With Integrity, as I do.

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I am probably the last person in the world who should ever give anybody any kind of financial advice. I run out of paycheck long before the next one comes in -- although, in this economy, that seems to be happening to more and more people.

"In this economy." Heh. Wish I had that excuse fifteen years ago, when I totally trashed my credit and had to borrow money from basically everybody I knew to keep myself from being sent to debtors' prison, when I was just a little naïve and a whole lot of stupid.

It's taken us a long time to get our money situation in order, and a lot of that is because of me. I admit this. And even now, we're not in the best shape, financially-speaking, but we're better off than a lot of people. Even when my husband was out of work, we managed to make ends meet, somehow. Primarily because he is good at managing his money, but also because I think that maybe I have finally, after all this time, learned to manage mine.

That sounds weird, probably -- "his money" and "my money," but that's the arrangement that works for us. We've been married for almost 12 years, and we still have separate checking accounts. People tell us it's bizarre to do this, deranged even, but we have a standing agreement that we will not commingle our finances until we are done paying for the things for which we are individually responsible.

I don't want him paying my student loans. I don't want him paying for the long-lost crap that I bought in college that I am still on the hook for. That is my debt, not his, and I don't want him to be stuck with those burdens. What's his is his, and what's mine is mine, and what's ours is split as evenly as possible between us.

So the mortgage, the phone bills, the cable -- each of us pays a portion. Groceries and household stuff and things for Shae, we split. We take turns. But my car? I paid for that, and he pays for his. My gas? I pay for that too. My snacks and donations to the vending machine at work? I have to budget for these little luxuries, even if it means scrounging around in my ashtray and in the couch cushions if I want that stuff.

Sometimes it takes a bit of financial alchemy when there is a long time left before the next payday and I need to stretch the last $17 in my wallet over ten days. But we do manage to have enough money for the "big important stuff," like holidays and travel, because I believe very strongly in Christmas Club and Vacation Club. We've paid cash for about 90% of our gifts for the last three Christmases because of my Christmas Club.

Even when things were at their worst, during that 18-month stretch when my husband was unemployed, we never really had to worry about losing our house or losing our cars or anything, because our separate-but-equal strategy worked extremely well for us. Every extra couple of bucks got squirreled away for emergencies, so that when we had unexpected car repairs or a busted sink or whatever, we had a secret stash to get us through. We still have money left from our 2009 tax refund, which I think is pretty darned impressive.

So maybe I'm the last person in the world who should ever give anybody any kind of financial advice -- but believe me, whatever we are doing, it's working. And I am not about to muck about with a good thing.

Fun Fab Five

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(Reprint of a post that originally appeared on the 'riffic.)

Today is a snow day for us -- ONCE AGAIN -- and so while Shae's sitting around watching movies and playing with noisy toys and taking a nap (a nice, looooooooooooong winter's nap, right? RIGHT?), I get to catch up on my blog reading. I read A LOT of blogs, some semi-regularly, some occasionally, some just once-and-done. If a link pops up in my twitter feed, I'm pretty likely to click it. But there are about a dozen or so blogs that I read ALL THE TIME, written by people that I would very much like to hang out with someday, have a drink and some appetizers and shoot the breeze, preferably in an undisclosed tropical location with access to absolute bucketfuls of margaritas and conch fritters. Five of these people are so fabulous that they took pity on my poor soul and have become Twitter or Facebook friends, and these are the top five blogs I will be reading today, to get caught up and keep from getting cabin fever while I wait for my husband to call and tell me that he is safely at work.

(Please note that I did not includes by anyone in my family or anyone who is family-adjacent because I don't want to forget anybody. Also, this list is in alphabetical order.)

Chibi Jeebs: Sometimes I think that Chibi is a long-lost twin or something, because we seem to have a lot in common. She turned me on to Lose It, so I guess I have her to thank for my losing 70 lbs. since May 2010, even though all she did was mention the app and I did all the heavy lifting. She is funny, neurotic, sarcastic, smart and smart-mouthed -- occasionally I will read something she wrote and slap myself in the forehead for not writing that line first. My very favorite story of hers is the one about the Car Accident. I want Chibi to have my back in a parking-lot slap-fight.

Dancing Lemur: Another blogger that I think is a long-lost twin (triplet)? She's from North Carolina and knows what a Moravian star is. She also plays Zynga games on Facebook with me, and one of these days she's going to convince me to actually attend a blogging conference. Hypothetically. For her, I might actually do it. I think she's at a blogging conference right now (hope she're having fun and keeping warm). She takes great pictures and we have a similar aesthetic regarding Christmas and you KNOW how seriously I take Christmas.

The Domestic Goddess: D-Gods (that's what I call her -- it is probably not her name for herself) is local to me and I might have to start stalking her, because she is made of awesome. She is a constant reminder that propriety is highly situational for parents of small children. Her "About" page is a thing of absolute beauty and staggering genius, but if I had to pick a favorite post, it would be the one about the Unmade Resolutions.

Jodifur: Jodifur reminds me of college, in all the best ways (and yes there actually were some). She and I are around the same age and have some similar things in common and she seems to react to stuff in the same kind of ways that I do, so again with the long-lost twin thing (are we up to quadruplets, now)? Also, she loves Sim City, and it's really, really hard for me to disagree with anyone who loves Sim City.

Temerity Jane: Sweet cracker sandwich. Sometimes, when I read this blog, I laugh so hard I need oxygen. That is about as ringing an endorsement as you're ever going to get from me. I love this blog for the same reason Jessica Rabbit loves Roger Rabbit: she makes me laugh. Literally LOL. Funny is fabulous. Don't believe me? See for yourself.

So go check these ladies out. I promise you won't be sorry.

(Oh, and also, blog authors? One of my New Year's resolutions was to comment more, so I promise to stop being a secret stalker soon!)

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Don't forget to enter the 50 Fabulous Wishes contest for a chance to win $1,000 to support a friend's wish. I was selected for this Tropicana Trop50 sponsorship by the Clever Girls Collective, which endorses Blog With Integrity, as I do. I received compensation to use and facilitate my post.